I Love to Think

I woke up to the sound of faint drizzle. It's a nostalgic, lovely kind of sound. And as I peered through the curtains I realized that even when the morning is as cloudy as it is today, it is the fresh lush greenery that brings happiness to your life.

Th entire motive of writing this blog post is to vent out those churning thoughts that often erupt inside of my brain.

Here I am, right out of my bed, with my hair all messed up and surrounded by that fluffy comforter; no cup of coffee or tea. I don't quite like any of them. And I'm doing what I love the most......staring at the rain drops sticking to the window pane and writing.

Last night, I had one of the most beautiful dreams ever. I saw a congregation of all those wonderful people I love; those who are a part of my life, as well as those who are not anymore. I think I must have been in some kind of paradise, because when can you really see everyone you love at the same time? And I was so happy that I kind of went around talking to everyone about everything. I was even crazy enough to dance with some of them. This was that kind of dream that doesn't quite end. It sort of seeps into reality and when you wake up you feel like you are still a part of it. I didn't know whether I was supposed to be sad that many of those people I met had long stepped out of my life, or if I was supposed to be happy that we would all meet again in the near future.

Before I went to sleep last night, I walked down to the back gates. I had an electronic copy of The Great Gatsby with me, and that was more than enough to keep me occupied. I sat by the water and spent an hour midst the life of those Americans. It amazes me how fictional characters can sometimes be better company. They seem to possess this supernatural tendency to absorb you into their life. It's okay to be surrounded by a million people when you're in college. Some of them are really good friends. But sometimes one likes to take a break from this social circle to reflect upon Life. Just Life and nothing else. Maybe with a novel in your hand.

Yesterday, I was pretty disturbed by the consequences of wrong decisions. Most of the times we blame ourselves for not carrying out a task properly. What we forget is that perhaps we shouldn't have chosen to do this task on the first place. It's momentary happiness versus permanence. It's the hardest decision to make when you choose your career, or your friends and even when you're falling in love. But sometimes it also doesn't matter what you choose, as long as you learn.

By the time I am 30, I will be able to fully understand why my Mom said, "You're too young now. Once you're old enough and you have experienced a bit of life, you'll be able to decide better."

So before I went to sleep with these fleeting thoughts in my head, I made a decision. It won't matter if it is right or not anymore. Because this Life is so beautiful. Because I'm always learning. Even if I wake up tomorrow beneath a gloomy thunderous sky. I'm just glad that in the end, there is always so much hope. Like The Smiths' said, "There is a light that never goes Out.

There isn't a candle in our heart, there is a star. And it's up to us to fuel it with all the bright light this Universe has to offer.